So You Created a Wormhole

The Time Traveler's Guide to Time Travel

By Phil Hornshaw , Nick Hurwitch
Rolling plains stretch before you, plowed with hundreds of straight brown furrows, tended by an equal number of serfs. They speak to one another in a strange derivative of English you can’t quite make out. They’re dirty and disgusting, don’t understand you, and have just watched you appear out of thin air. You think the fast, frightening pace with which they’re speaking means they’re about to tie you up and set you on fire for being in league with the devil. You have minutes, maybe less, to save your own life. So you pop open the door to your time machine and grab your copy of SO YOU CREATED A WORMHOLE: THE TIME TRAVELER’S GUIDE TO TIME TRAVEL. You flip to the section entitled “Surviving in Time: Medieval Europe.” You find “Important Phrases for Communicating with Medieval Britons.” You shout, “Seeth yon staff o’ firestorm which explodeth hence upon thy horrible faces!”
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